ohshititsgreg:

A part of me dies every time no one gets my joke

• my resume: one time i defeated a boss battle without dying

qweety:

urbanmongoose:

Normal cats shake their butt when they’re about to pounce on something. Polly shakes her head. .-.

Oh my god

firelorcl:

firelorcl:

my new style

doglets:

This shampoo was supposed to give my hair volume but I really can’t hear anything

disneyprincest:

why are my parents always like “go to bed.” i am in bed. im always in bed. you go to bed. stop talking to me.

I’m literally my own best friend like I have inside jokes with myself and sometimes I’ll think something funny and start laughing out loud at how funny I am

do you ever just realize how bad your voice sounds

nerdjpg:

nerdjpg:

nerdjpg:

nerdjpg:

guess how many pairs of nunchucks I have

nun

guess how many followers i lost because of this post

many

nerdjpg:

top 5 reasons to get an iphone

1. emojis
2. emojis
3. emojis
4. emojis
5. emojis 

I stay alive for like 3 people lol

nerdjpg:

nerdjpg:

me in the summer: fire cannot kill a dragon

me in the winter: the cold never bothered me anyway

chickenuqqet:

“hate’s a strong word”

ten-and-donna:

cumber-kitty:

brandyalexanders:

drink your school stay in sleep don’t do milk and get eight hours of drugs

yes sir

He looks like he’s followed all that advice.